i hope kate and william call their baby kong so that when he becomes king he will be called king kong




you can make anything sound sexual just by whispering it

would you like a better deal on your car insurance

oh baby lower my rates

(Source: maahammy, via laughcentre)

Sneezing during a test




via sodamnrelatable

(Source: bookofawesome, via sodamnrelatable)

Sex scene with parent around


via sodamnrelatable

(via sodamnrelatable)

"Hey remember when you had a crush on—"


via sodamnrelatable

(Source: mishasminions, via sodamnrelatable)

  • *hears noises at night*: Well I guess this is the end for me, I had a good life
  • *gets shampoo in eye*: I guess I'm blind now how am I ever going to see my first born child
  • *heart is beating fast*: I think I'm having a heart attack is this what cardiac arrest is
  • *a cop walks by*: Here I go about to get arrested I probably murdered someone
  • *taking a test*: Don't take your eyes off the paper you will get caught cheating and kicked out of school and become a peasant
  • *gets sunburn*: Great now I have skin cancer how will I tell my parents
  • *tripping over something*: I guess my leg will have to get amputated why did this happen to me